Wednesday, February 8, 2012

"Not Good Enough"

There is a mean bully that lives deep inside of my conscious. I’m not sure exactly when he arrived, but I know he didn’t come from my parents or family. On most days I can ignore him. He lurks just behind my self esteem and feeds off my insecurities and defeats. He comes alive with that quiet voice inside of my head that says, “You’re not good enough.” Maybe you have experienced him too. Whenever we get the courage to try something new, begin a new project, establish new goals and objectives that bully shows up to say “you can try, but you know you are not good enough.” We hear those words over and over in our minds and before we know we begin to say the same thing to our children, our grandchildren, or even others in the church. We might not say them out loud of course because that would be rude, but we say them with our actions and lack of enthusiasm. There are times we can over come this voice and move forward but most of the time we listen to them and stand still. It freezes us from moving forward. It constantly has us compare ourselves to others.

This bully carries over into our faith as well. When we think about how God’s loves us, how Christ sacrificed himself of our mistakes, how at the end of the day, with all our mess ups, God still forgives us, loves us, and desires a close relationship with us, we hear that voice of “you’re not good enough.” The truth is that we are not good enough to save ourselves. That can only come through the love, grace, and mercy of our Savior Jesus Christ. But we allow the bully’s voice to keep us from moving forward in our faith: “I’m not good enough to get involved in our faith community; I don’t have any gifts to offer.” “I’m not good enough to invite people to church, because my life is not perfect.” “I’m not good enough to lead a new ministry in the church, I don’t have much time.” “I’m not good enough to talk about my faith.” “I’m not good enough to serve God in a public role in the faith community.” We have heard these voices and they have kept us from growing in our faith and relationship with God and others. Through out scripture, Christ’s tells us many times that we are good enough. The gifts that we bring will be sanctified and bring honor and glory to God. But we must be willing to bring them and not horde them or keep them hidden. It is the way we live out our love for Christ. It is recognizing that we are all children of God, valued, accepted, and desired by God to give what we have.
When we are willing to stop listening to the bully in our heads, we begin to grow, mature, and become stronger for the journey ahead. When we step forward with our gifts and take that risk, God blesses us beyond measure. We face life with a confidence that only comes from up above. We might not feel we are good enough, but God has the confidence in us to use us, if we are willing to defeat the bully inside of us.
Peace, Love & Happiness.

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